Posts Tagged ‘Drugs’

PLEASE DON’T CANCEL SWEET VALLEY HIGH

September 3, 2008

Apparently valium has replaced heroin as a popular street drug because it’s cheaper than heroin. I’d like to take this opportunity to ask everyone to remain calm and not get to hysterical.

First of all, from a public health perspective this is a good thing. A pharmaceutical-grade opiate is much less harmful than street gear. Ok, there’s still a risk of HIV or hepatitis from sharing needles – if it’s being injected – or overdosing. But there needs to be some degree of personal responsibility. It’s never good to live in a victim culture.

But more importantly, for the sad and lonely, a pizza and 20mgs of diazepam washed down with a couple of cold beers and a season of The Wire in the DVD player is one of life’s few pleasures. Also, with codeine-based cough syrup not widely available in the UK, valium is a good substitute, and is great for enhancing the music of Lil Wayne. Eyehategod and Sleep also sound amazing.

Actually, if I’m in a syrup mood, I like to replace the beer with a pint of melon and apple juice and a generous shot of vodka, and the pizza with hotdogs. Salty, fruity and floaty – it’s a perfect combination.